wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
