I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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