omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
