I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
