So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
