i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
