i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
