Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
