How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
