my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
This can only be settled by a dance off.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
