shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
