To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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