Please, let me fuck your mom
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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