i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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