yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
