have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
