they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
