bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
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