Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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