after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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