We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
