Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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