Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
