So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
