We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
