I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
