Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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