Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
