I wanna bring you to show and tell
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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