the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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