It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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