Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
