you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Randomize
