they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I am mentally ready for anal.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
