I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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