I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
