i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
