Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
