thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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