Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
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