I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
