She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
