I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
