I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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