Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
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