We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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