Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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