id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
