i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
