Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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